MATURE ONLY PLEASE. ADDICTion?

i am only 20 years old, and i have had with at least 30 guys, but i am married now and have a baby girl on the way(1st child) , this is bascially why i had to have all the time, when i was a little girl i was ually abused by my grandfather ,uncle, and ex bf, and one cousin. it was harsh , but this all happend when i was really young, all of these guys told me it was all for love, that when you loved someone you had with them, cuz sopposedly that was the only way to show love or any type of emotion, i was between 6-10 when it was my g-pa,unlce, cousin, my ex bf was a whole different story and i knew what meant by then, but the happend on multiple occasions when i was little, and it was a feeling that i liked, but again i say i didnt know any better, and it was taught to me that meant to show love, i had to go through years of therapy for it, i never had sex with an acctual guy unitl i was 16 and i knew this guy since i was 4 years old, and it felt right when i finally did it on my own, and i would just start having sex with different guys, i would thing it was all great then i would go to the next and i would even cheat on boyfriends just to get what i needed, i watched all the time, had lots of toys , i was just that addicted to it all the way up until i believe i was 18 nearly 19 ,i always had protection but one day i got a really bad infection that the doctors believed was genital , and that was something that would never go away , they literallly had me believing i really had it, but my tests came back and it wasnt an std but instead bacterial vaginosis, nasty enough if you ask me, but it was enough to tell me to relaize what i was doing was wrong and so many guys i had hurt just to get what i needed , sex was my drug, it always relaxed me ,made me feel better. and i was a virgininty stealer, those were the best, getting to show them what you can do and make them better , but when i did this they always were done with me and went to another girl and so far they all have been in serious relationships since then some have even got kids and are married, lol but me i was still looking , but after the std scare i stopped having sex altogether i voweled to find the love of my life, cuz who knows if i would have continued i might have really gotten one, im thankful to not have one , but i no longer watch , i threw out all my toys, and btw( it never helped me my family owned a adult store so i had toys and and other things all around me lol it was defiantly a challenge for me) i changed so much , being with that many guys showed me what i was looking for, i met a guy who accepted me for what i have done in my past and what has happend, ive told him everything evne how many guys iv ebeen with and he accepts me , he was a virgin when we got together he showed me that i could resist sex by teasing me all the time for i believe 2 months ,then finally we had sex and it was the most amazing thing i ever felt, and i realized that i loved this man, i am now happily married and me and him have our first child on the way, she is due in 9 weeks, and we cant wait to start out family and lives together, i know its hard what your going through , but you will eventually stop what your ddoing and settle down nearly all men do, its just a phase that alot of people go through, my brother is your age and does the same thing and he just now starting to be in some relationships, but onluy uou know what you want right now and its up to you on how to proceed any further , good luck hun